Now that I try to actively stay away from making or contributing to foss, I'm now wondering how and why I wasted so much time with it, and why I was so personally invested with all of it.

I feel kinda useless rn. But I guess that's what happens when you give up something that was kind of a big part of your life for ~10 years.

I guess I have to figure out what I *actually* want to do with the time that I have.

I kinda like being useful/doing something useful, something that other people get sth out of, but on the other hand, I kinda don't like people all that much and *really* don't wanna deal with people anymore, outside of a few close friends and my partner.

Idk, I feel like dealing with people outside of my own friend circle always means drama and shit.

I'm seeing my friends at TSN or the polyproto dev getting things off the ground and doing things, and I'm incredibly happy for them, but I am wondering how they manage to do so without all the bullshit I've had to deal with so far. Idk, maybe they have to deal with such things and are just good at that.

Idk. Maybe I'm just not cut out for that stuff these days.

I wish I didn't have to choose between making foss and provide useful stuff to users, and not being lied about and/or harassed.

It didn't used to be like this.

Idk, I just wanna write code that people can get a use out of. That's it. I don't want drama, I don't want to deal with lies about me, I don't wanna be involved with some fuckass companies controversy. Why does that keep happening?

@stilic @lucydev just like in centrism

a neutral stance is a conservative stance

@nelson @stilic @lucydev i mean tbh i think fundamentally a neutral stance will always be one for the status quo so like yeah

@nelson @stilic honestly, i think since more and more people got interested in foss over the last 10 years or so, it also attracted a bunch of those fuckasses that are just in it for drama and picking fights.

Yeah ig the "apolitical" bs and LLMs do take the fun out of it (LLMs less so for me compared to the Anti-AI crowd right now), but it's mostly the dramaqueens chasing clout by talking shit about everyone and everything

Ig the main issue for me is how twitter-coded foss has become

@lucydev @stilic i blame this on social media existing as it does right now

@nelson @stilic 100% with you on this

Don't even feel comfortable having a git repo public at this point anymore